Indian women are bred to be selfless. And Indian TV celebrates it.
All through ancient, medieval and modern times, society has eternalised the rhetoric of selflessness to control women’s bodies and minds. The female ego has been vilified as being synonymous to toxic femininity – effectively incepting a guilty conscience in women.
One that embroils us in self-doubt when we think self-serving thoughts, do something for ourselves or consciously attract attention. Moreover, the patriarchy has perpetuated the myth that self-effacement is femininity’s virtue.
Which is BS – because femininity is a bequest of intrinsic strength.
Our foremothers have passed on that secret to us as aphorisms. Female fearlessness is in our lore. Femininity is dynamic, intuitive, ferocious, compassionate. Also, women can be just as masculine, as they are feminine.
Antara and Manushi discuss this will Miraal
WATCH THE FULL EPISODE HERE
Our culture as depicted in Indian Television, lauds the male ego no matter how reckless it is – but holds women to a whole different altruistic standard.
Narcissism is second nature to men, but society doesn’t hold them accountable for being selfish. Ladies, on the other hand, must be humble, blameless, obedient, polite, altogether virtuous.
Our culture celebrates women’s self-sacrifice but abhors any form of female assertion. Of course, female rage is acceptable when it fits into patriarchal tropes – of women fighting to protect their dignity, or kith and kin.
But when feisty females refuse to be part of the patriarchal edifice altogether, they are branded as self-centered bitches.
Because badass ladies are sure to topple misogynistic rubric of all sorts. Turn the sexist order inside out, upside down.
The patriarchy has always known what women are capable of – which is why it has imposed the obligation of selflessness on us.
You see, selflessness is an instrument of oppression that keeps women from seeking positions of power.
It makes us feel guilty for having the nerve to care about ourselves. It denies us the freedom to live out our desires. To love who we want. Be what we will. It projects the insecurities of the world onto our bodies and minds.
Shackles us to an endless charade of living up to other people’s expectations – leaving us emotionally and physically exhausted.
