At the end of Shantaram – after 11 hours of painstakingly slow television – we learn that this isn’t even the end of the story we’ve spent half a day watching. There’s more TV coming – probably of about the same length as the TV you’ve just seen.

Shantaram is perhaps a two percent fictionalized memoir and the rest a pastiche packed with characters and storylines that almost everybody will find entertaining but not memorable.

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